I am twenty-eight, and I am single. I don’t know whether I always will be, but I am sure single now. Several of my friends, both men and women, are in the same boat. And some of us will never marry.
For the sake of discussion, let’s pretend that’s where I am–single and going to stay there until I give up my last earthly breath and go to be with Jesus.
A verse in Ezekiel regarding the Levite priests jumped out at me last week:
“And it shall be with regard to an inheritance for them, that I am their inheritance; and you shall give them no possession in Israel—I am their possession.” (Ezekiel 44:28)
That stuck out to me because it’s so like the life of a single Christian. Inheritance on earth is rightly measured by children, by family legacy. A single Christian has none of that. Should I remain single, there will be no one carrying on my name, no one who looks like me and has inherited my DNA and my worldview. No one whose duty it is to take care of me in my old age and put up with me if I get all forgetful and cranky.
But I do have Jesus. In fact, Paul tells me that my lifestyle perfectly positions me to be fully devoted to him, holy in body and in spirit, free from the distractions and the ties that literally bind. This is good.
So why, when I read the words, “you shall give them no possession–I am their possession” does it feel so much like trading something for nothing?
Before you jump in with many protestations of the goodness and rightness of marriage, let me say that I heartily believe in the goodness and rightness of marriage. It is abundantly clear that God has designed marriage to show forth his reality in a unique and marvelous way, as well as to provide for many of the needs of his children. But it is also clear that God has designed a special calling and purpose for those who are single. As much as God worked his will through Abraham and Sarah, Joseph and Mary, Aquila and Priscilla, so he also worked his will through Daniel, and Paul, and Luke. And Jesus.
So when I say “Having only God for my possession feels unreal, like I am not actually being given anything,” I don’t think the best response is to jump in and say, “Oh, well, you can get married! Marriage is good!” Marriage is good, but marriage isn’t ultimate. It’s not even eternal. God is. And God apparently considers himself a worthy inheritance, a worthy possession, without the earthly blessings of marriage and family added to him.
My point is this: the Levite priests were not getting a bum deal when God made himself their possession and their inheritance. They were getting the absolute best.
So without at all diminishing the goodness of marriage, I desire to see this change in me: that I would come to recognize God as just as real, just as fulfilling, and just as beautiful as an earthly inheritance would be. Rather than pining for a husband I don’t have, I wish to learn to enjoy the God I do. Rather than wishing I had a household to run, I wish to tend His household faithfully. Rather than mourning the lack of an earthly legacy, I wish to build a heavenly one.
And I wish to do all of that even if God intends for me to marry one day (for whatever reason–because he has decided that he wants to make my life fruitful as a wife and mother, because he wants me to help show the picture of Christ and his bride that is only found in marriage, because he sees my needs and chooses to meet them that way).
Because if I can learn to embrace God as my inheritance and my possession, I will not have wasted these years. I will have enjoyed the gift God has given me rather than wishing for one I do not have. I will have exalted him as my greatest love and my greatest treasure. And I think that’s a marvelous calling to have.
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